Leaving a Legacy

It has been an emotional week! Last Saturday afternoon I was driving with four of the kids & my husband called. We had only been out of the house about 15 minutes. He sounded very upset. He proceeded with "Pap passed away a few minutes ago." Pap was his father's dad. His health had slowly declined over the last six years or so since having a stroke. But, we still weren't expecting this. My kids quickly asked what was wrong and I hesitated to answer struggling to find the right words. As they insisted on an answer I said "Someone we love has gone to be with Jesus.....It was Pap." Both my girls quickly burst into tears asking why he had to go. Hudson didn't quite understand what had happened or where Pap had gone. This made it a little easier so that I could console my four-year-old, Trinity, who has sobbing uncontrollably.

We pulled up at my parents house as I got off the phone with my husband. My parents knew Pap and greatly admired him. My mother adored his big blue eyes and his gorgeous smile. Since his stroke his speech was hard to understand at times but the warmth of his smile & the sparkle in his eye drew just about anyone to him. Little kids sometimes are scared or uncomfortable with older people but all of mine would go right to him, hug him & sit in his lap. He had a way about him that was so kind & peaceful. I knew my parents would want to know of his passing. 

I asked my husband not to tell our oldest, Brayden, about Pap until I had gotten home. He had the closest relationship with him & I feared he would take it pretty hard. That evening I came home and my husband's parents had stopped by and told Brayden about Pap. I was somewhat relieved to not have to tell Brayden but also happy that they were able to comfort him & spend some time with him. Brayden is very close with Stephen's parents and I knew they would be able to help him handle it.

When I tucked him in bed that night his emotions bubbled over and he asked why God had to take him. The thought of never seeing Pap again was just too much for him to bear. I told him about a friend I had and how much I always admired her faith & her immense love for the Lord. She had lost her 2 year-old daughter to drowning but somehow she has peace about it and still finds joy everyday. Every time I see her she is genuinely happy and it radiates to everyone around her. I couldn't fathom what she has been through ! She told me once that the only way she has gotten through losing her daughter was her faith and knowing that this life here on earth is only temporary but our life in heaven is for eternity. And one day she will be with her daughter again and it will be for eternity. She doesn't look at it as though she has "lost" her little girl, she said she is still my daughter and always will be, she is with Jesus until I can be with her again. I told Brayden this so that he would know that we will see Pap again one day and that he is in a much better place now with Jesus. He seemed to be comforted by that.

The funeral was in Lufkin, his hometown. The service was lovely, many sweet stories were told about the beloved man. I learned he was one of eleven children and a very simple man. A former co-worker, who is now a pastor, gave the eulogy and he did a wonderful job. Pap was a devoted father and grandfather and his love for his family is something everyone knew about him. He was married for 46 years. He had five children, four daughter-in-laws and one son-in-law, eight grandchildren, and five great-grandchildren. One of the quotes that was read was "It's not about the things we can buy our children, for they will never remember that, but instead about the time we spend with them and the way we make them feel."  Pap made everyone feel important and loved. The pastor spoke of how many friends Pap had and how the bible tells us to be a friend to others and that's exactly what he was. That was clear by the crowd that came to pay their respects.

As we drove home from that east Texas town, it was apparent how different life would be if we lived in one of the many towns along the way with a population of less than 1,000. Life would be much simpler and not as focused on the material things; our clothes, the cars we drive, the kids toys & all the electronic gadgets. It reminded me that our quest for "success" and all the things that come with it will not be remembered when we are gone. What will be remembered is who we really are and the impact we made on those around us. I want my children to know true happiness can only be attained through our relationship with Christ and the peace of knowing He is in control; all we have to do is seek Him & listen to the Holy Spirit guiding us.